China has had its ups and downs throughout its history as have I, but strangely enough, the past decade has led us to grow into a intertwined life path - unexpected, yet seemingly destined.
The Xia Dynasty
My first experience with the country came on a holiday to Beijing and Xi’An in the Fall of 1999. It wasn’t exactly the dream holiday for a pleasure seeking and quite frankly spoilt child in the middle of adolescence. At the ripe age of 14, I had visited more temples than probably Dalai Lama himself so I was more interested in laying on some beach somewhere than in seeing the dead body of a tyrant. Nevertheless China did intrigue me, how could it not with its rich culture, mystique, and folklore – translated to me as kung-fu, pandas, and dragons in those days..
The Great Wall didn’t end up impressing me as much as I thought it would. I couldn’t see what was so special about it, a simple ladder from your local shop would have undone its purpose and the 1000+ years it took to build it. Just like the Great Wall itself, I perhaps had the fake illusion that I was more important that the other things in this world and consequently was unable to establish a real connection with China. That fall at the turn of the millennium, I vowed never to return to the Middle Kingdom ever again. I deemed it backwards, uncivil, and without life – probably the exact opinion that China had of me…
It took me just three years to return to the land from which I had banished myself. The circumstances presented themselves in such a way that I really had no choice once again. My parents had moved to Shanghai and I made frequent visits during the Easter and Christmas holidays throughout my University years. It seemed as if destiny was playing a cruel trick on me and imposing that I treasure the Pearl of the Orient. I can’t say I fell in love with it the second time around either. Sure, Shanghai with its strong Western influences, the cheap shopping, the vibrant nightlife and exotic girls did warm me up to what was becoming a fascinating land. There was such rapid growth and change, it seemed like China was in the middle of its very own adolescence. However, once again I dismissed the idea of ever actually moving and living there on the grounds that it was a large disconnected vacuum – whether it is geographically, sociologically, politically or culturally.
The Qing Dynasty
I myself was very disconnected at the time. Freshly out of university, I took a couple of months of holiday to decide my course in life. I ended up in the heart of another kingdom – London in the United Kindgom was where I would chase whatever I was seeking. I wasn’t sure what I wanted to do, where to do it, or how to do it - so I eventually decided to apply to the top companies in the world in perhaps the most competitive area possible (creative marketing) in one of the most cutthroat cities in the world. Much like China in the wake of its rightful flourishing into a nation with endless opportunities - I thought if I aim high it doesn’t matter the direction I take. My interviewers didn’t see it that way – they questioned whether I was really a people person and credit to them they were absolutely right, I wasn’t. Much like China – the ‘people aspect’ was never my strong point.
In the end, I was chasing the wrong career, the wrong dream, and worst of all I was even in the wrong place. London, whilst being everything I thought I wanted, was really not proving to be the place where I wanted to spend my golden years. Most of my friends were residing there and I had decided to enroll in a Finance Masters program to pursue a career more fitting for me. However the problem with that plan was that I knew exactly how the next 5 years of my life was going to pan out, and that thought really frightened me as I envision Mao’s 5 year plans frightened the Chinese people. I’ve always been one to live life not knowing what unexpected turn my life could take. After all, I pretty much had to – considering that 4 times before in my life I had lived in a place for at least 3 years, and had to leave everything behind and start a new life somewhere else. So it seemed like I needed to do that once more – forget the past, and start afresh… much like the beginning of a new dynasty. And I got that unexpected opportunity in March of 2007.
The Western Zhou Dynasty
The prospect was simple – I would move to Shanghai where my parents and brother were living and join a multinational company working in finance where I wished to begin my career. Sure I would have to start out living in my parents house, have no friends, work in a challenging field relatively new to me, and enter work more through connections than my own hunt - but that didn’t stop me from pulling the trigger faster than a lead in a John Woo movie. As expected, the first few months were a challenge – but as China itself seemed to be doing, I swept the negatives under the rug, focused largely on the positives and tried to develop myself as much as possible.
Things were starting to look up until a series of unfortunates events happened. My parents had a serious car accident essentially leading them to return to Belgium, my brother decided to move to Thailand, and before I knew what had happened I was all alone in this country that only several years ago I had declared I would never set foot on again. China itself was going through a rough patch - the weather problems during the Chinese New Year, the political turmoil in Tibet and Darfur, the boycott requests of the Olympics, and recently the earthquake in Sichuan.
Amidst this circumstantial chaos, China and I bonded. China’s vibrant and often times hectic lifestyle was an interesting backdrop to my gloomy attitude at the time. One of the reasons why I had left England was that everyday felt like “Groundhog Day”, but China was proving to be the complete opposite. To this day, I don’t think I’ve had one day pass where I didn’t witness something new. Perhaps on your regular walk to work one Monday morning you will realize that a regular Chinese shop has been replaced by a Nike store in the span of one weekend, you might find some carrots slip into your Big Mac, you might see a street fight between a man and a woman, you might see your colleagues cut their toenails in the office, or you might just simply see a hilarious English sign that has been mistranslated.
China’s attraction didn’t stop at interesting everyday experiences. It’s fast emergence and growth has led it to skip a generation and adopt some really new and innovative technology and business practices not present in most areas of the world. Home delivery is available for anything from dry cleaning, to restaurant meals, to custom tailoring, all the way to massage services – all at bargain prices and even with the ability to order over MSN. Taxis/boats/and practically any flat surface in town has inbuilt TV’s, DVD stores can be found on every street corner, electronic shops with everything imaginable are plentiful – all bringing China to the forefront of countries obsessed over consumer electronics.
Truth remained however, that besides experiencing a wildly mesmerizing culture and enjoying the comfort of a King-like lifestyle, something else was needed. What does every 23 year old’s heart beat for? Why, the nightlife of course. It’s hard to imagine any place in the world better for this. Hot exotic girls? Check. World class clubs, bars, restaurants? Check. Affordable prices? Check. Local girls’ interest in foreigners? Triple check. While a night out in a city such as London could easily cost over 100pounds, end up terribly after ending up in a pretentious club full of overweight and overdrunk girls, with perhaps a few fights and yelling somewhere – Shanghai’s nightlife hardly ever disappoints. Relaxed, safe, cheap, interesting, entertaining…the positive adjectives to describe it are endless.
So life was interesting, it was easy, and it was fun. Isn’t that all that’s needed to like something? Perhaps, but something deeper is needed to actually love something – and I believe much like most kinds of love, this takes time to build and fortify. For me its taken approximately a decade, dating back to my first visit as a immature 14 year old – but now I truly feel it “Wo ai China”. Was it that China changed and I started liking it, or had I changed and China started liking me?
There are countless handbooks teaching you about places, but none that teach you how to love it. The simple fact is that if its destined to be, it will eventually win you over. The smile on the faces of desperate vendors in downtown Shanghai, the voices of the young girls singing songs in the streets of Lijiang, the beauty of Guilin’s natural sights, the majestic presence of Beijing…these are some of the flashes of this great nation that win a permanent spot in your heart. As Confucius once said: “Everything has its beauty, but not everyone sees it”. I’m just glad I finally got to see it.
Tags:
ai china,
love china
